Thursday, August 1, 2013

You know you're working for the Jesuits when...

1.  Leaving the toilet seat up is standard office practice.

2.  Going out for dinner or staying home becomes a matter of "discernment."

3.  Even if aliens landed in the centre of town and started playing Born to Run with Bruce Springsteen, you know community night is community night, and they're staying home.

4.  You can make any nonsense real if you add the word "Ignatian" in front of it. Real things like Ignatian spirituality, Ignatian prayer, Ignatian exercises lead to thinks like Ignatian bacon and eggs...

5.  You can have a three-hour conversation ONLY about people who you know in common.

6.  You're never more than two degrees of separation from the Rosebud Indian Reservation.

7.  Going to Mass is part of the work day.

8.  A tweet from the Pope becomes regular coffee break chit chat.

9.  Words like "Provincial," "Tertianship," and "dessolations" slip into your everyday language.

10.  Taking a class from Roc O'Connor is – in terms of social status – on par with taking a class from The Edge.

11.  Taking a vow of poverty starts looking pretty enticing.

12.  Drinks are almost always paid for.

13.  You use every excuse in the book to tell your Jesuit boss why you have to leave early, when the truth is you just have crippling menstrual pains.

14.  Although you work for a man, the office is nearly 100% women.

15.  The Pope is pretty much the 5th Beatle.

16. Saint Ignatius of Loyola, Saint Francis Xavier and Father General Adolfo Nicolas become Iggy, Frank and Nico.

17.  A heated debate will ensue about whether a week-long Ignatian retreat counts agains allotted holidays.

18. You watch Steven Colbert, hoping Fr James Martin makes an appearance.

19.  You never mention the Franciscans, the Dominicans, the Maryknolls or any of the "non-Jesuit" orders. Episcopalians are ok, but just barely.

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